Grief is a strange thing. The days go by and appear from the outside to be normal. Taking the kids to the park, getting groceries, taking care of Ellie. But from the inside they are different. They will never be the same.

I was pregnant for nine months and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. I had dreams for her, dreams that were not realized when she was born severely disabled. But our dreams changed, molded to the new reality. We set up her crib next to Ellie and had medical equipment delivered. We adapted. We planned.

But that all ended when Hannah had a tracheal bleed that proved to be fatal. We said goodbye to our precious baby girl, to the plans we had for her.

It is hard to come to grips with dreams lost. Our house will not be full of the many children we had hoped and longed for. It has been hard to get used to the "new normal."

We struggle with questions throughout the day: What is God's plan for us? Why wouldn't he give us the good things we are asking for?

But our good is not always God's good. Our plans are not always his plans. We may have had dreams and goals, but our ultimate goal is God's GLORY. And that is what is happening. God is being glorified. He is glorified through Hannah's life, through the suffering of our family.

We mourn, we suffer, but not in vain. We suffer for the sake of Christ, comforted by a savior who has suffered much more. He has already given us everything we need, more than we could even ask for. He has given us eternity with God. That is where Hannah is already. She was created for eternity with her God.

Our prayer is that you know this comfort and that if you don't, that you would turn to God today. We will stand as witnesses that God is faithful and that Jesus Christ is worth suffering for.

For God's Glory--